Life CoUNSELLING

ASSERTIVENESS 

AGGRESSIVENESS & NON-ASSERTIVENESS

You are behaving ASSERTIVELY when you express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in direct, honest ways that do not violate another person's integrity.

Assertion involves respect both for your own needs and feelings and for those of the other person. 

You are behaving AGGRESSIVELY when you express your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs in ways that humiliate, degrade, belittle, or overpower the other person.

Little or no respect is shown for the needs or feelings of others.

You are behaving NON-ASSERTIVELY when you fail to express honest feelings, thoughts, and beliefs -- or express them in such an apologetic, diffident, or self-effacing way that others can easily disregard them.

 

Each One of Us Has the Right to...

• Say no to a request.
• Not give other people reasons for every action we take.
• Stop others from making excessive demands on us.
• Ask other people to listen to our point of view when we speak to them.
• Ask other people to correct errors they made which effect us.
• Change our minds.
• Ask other people to compromise rather than get only what they want.
• Ask other people to do things for us.
• Persist in making a request if people won't respond the first time.
• Be alone if we wish.
• Maintain our dignity in relationships.
• Evaluate our own behaviours and not just listen to evaluations that others offer.
• Make mistakes and accept responsibility for them.
• Avoid manipulation by other people.
• Pick our own friends without consulting our parents, peers, or anyone else.
• Let other people know how we are feeling.

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