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More About Self Esteem
List all of the things that you can think of that are positive about yourself. Add to your list.
Include things that others like about you. Commit to learning to like these things about yourself.
Accept compliments ALWAYS!!!!
Respond to every compliment with a simple, "Thank you".
No qualifications, explanations, or denials allowed! When you accept a compliment, you are communicating respect to the person who gave it to you.
Demonstrate self-respect by taking care of yourself. Eat properly. Get enough rest and sleep. Demand the same care for yourself that you would for your friends or children. ACT AS IF you like yourself. Eventually, you will!
Say "NO"! Set limits as to what you will tolerate in relationships. Give yourself permission to satisfy your own needs, desires, and wants before those of others. Practice assertiveness skills. (Saying "no" to salespeople is a good place to start!)
Grieve childhood losses. Many people with low self-esteem experienced some form of trauma or neglect in childhood. It is important to acknowledge this as a loss without blaming. When we are blaming, we are angry. Beneath the anger is the more painful hurt, which can be resolved only through validation and mourning. If you do not grieve, you are likely to waste years of adulthood searching for someone to meet these unmet childhood needs. The only human being who can meet these needs now is yourself. As with all healthy mourning, the grief does not last forever. Grieve properly and you will be able to let go and move forward.
Read the Promise poem on the next page
modified from www.twu.edu/o-sl/counseling
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